The Honourary Member

There was this movie which arrived during the Pongal season; Siruthai. It was a big hit. I caught up with the movie fairly late. All the reviews of this “family” movie mention that SOME of the scenes may be crude but no one has bothered to elucidate as to what exactly they mean. So for the benefit all those who haven’t seen this movie yet and those who have seen the movie but are secretly sadists and punish themselves on a daily basis I shall try to put forth in words what some of these crude scenes are.

WARNING: Offensive Content.

ANNOUNCEMENT: All the points mentioned below actually happen in the film. Nothing is exaggerated. If anyone can prove that I have distorted any facts then for the next Mic Mohan’s movie that comes out, the tickets will be on me. (Softcore pornography does not count as a legitimate film)

 

1. The villain of the film engages in inter-species fetish pornography i.e., he drinks a cow’s 1-bathroom (If anyone actually believes that the above mentioned process has any medicinal value then kindly isolate yourself from civilization and send your Curriculum Vitae to urinesampler_recruits@guineapigs.com)

2. The hero shaves the heads of middle aged women for comedic purposes (Technically he shaves only half their heads but….shudders……you get the general idea)

3. A group of ara-trouser wearing small boys enter the hero’s house and when they come out, they are all naked and the hero has their ara-trousers in his hands chasing them off. (I can’t even think of anything witty to write here…..sometimes…words….I….never mind….)

4 Immediately after the above scene happens the hero is seen fighting the children’s mothers….not verbally…but beats the hell out them….(I am sure that by this stage you’re expecting irrefutable proof so…)

5. The comedian goes 1-bathroom on the sands…..

6. The villain taunts an entire village by informing them that what runs in their body is not blood but rather his 1-bathroom (Is anybody else noticing a disturbing pattern among the scenes…)

7. Hips:
I’ll be honest. This isn’t the first time hips have made an appearance in films. But DAMN IT there was some context to them in the earlier films!! There was a reason they existed. For example the hero’s girlfriend, who was actually from usalampatti, needed oil to remove the sulukku. A better example is when some innocent kids come to you and ask you how the Bambaram operates. In which case you, being the future Deputy CM and whatnot, are obliged to show it to them.

The hero in this film, though, wants to touch it because….well he wants to touch it…that’s about it. So he proceeds to do so and you know what….the heroine actually enjoys it……and as a result Tammanah’s hips are given a “Special Appearance” credit when the film’s titles roll at the end.

So these are just a FEW of the crude scenes from the movie. After watching this film I have actually come to a conclusion about the hero of the film. Let us first plot a few points from his movie career. This man, Karthi, has in a matter of 5 or so films :-

1. Die half naked (they could have just killed him with an aruva to his throat….but no…they have to strip him first for some reason…).
2. Support a mad king who beheads midgets as sacrifice to his God.(see Aayirathil Oruvan uncut version) and
3. Get into cat-dog fights with middle aged women while shaving their heads and undressing their little children.

You see what he is doing. He is using all the powers vested in him to preserve the depravity of the idlivorous. So for this noble task I anoint him a honourary ubermachan.

T

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6 Responses to The Honourary Member

  1. Haha!! Very good article after a long time.. T at his form!

  2. Boss boss… Neenga kaattiyum kudukkureenga, koottiyum kudukkureengala..?
    Indha post-a apdiye oru A5 paperla print panni, andha Karthi-ku edho kalyanam nadakka povudhame? Andha mandapatthu vaasalla ellarukkum handouts-aa kudukkanum,,,:P

  3. Mr.T says:

    The movie is claimed to be a smash hit. Sources: behindwoods.com

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